Episodes

Jan. 9, 2021

Ep 63: Selfie Siege

Law Bite brings you a special episode to help dispel two prominent rumors floating out there: 1) A capitol hill rioter tasered himself in the balls, and 2) Donald Trump is mentally stable.

Listen to the Episode
Jan. 2, 2021

Ep 62: The Count(Down)

Happy New Year! Here's to democracy surviving all the abuse we've inflicted on it in the last four years. May we sweep the political dust under the rug, never to be found again... until the next election cycle.

Listen to the Episode
Dec. 25, 2020

Ep 61: Don't Mess with Santa

The holidays are a special time for everyone, criminals included. But don't you dare f--- with Santa.

Listen to the Episode
Dec. 19, 2020

Ep 60: Shower Power

It's nice to know that in times of need, our legislators and agencies are responding with groundbreaking new regulations-- to help make our time in the bathroom more pleasurable.

Listen to the Episode
Dec. 12, 2020

Ep 59: Support the Troops- Ish

Question: What's more important than the US Military? Answer: Getting even with Twitter.   New: Find us on Podchaser!

Listen to the Episode
Dec. 4, 2020

Ep 58: Star Trek v Klu Klux Klan

Here's to all the judges, court staff, and lawyers that have to listen to nutjobs in the courtroom: just hang in there, it'll all be over after you retire.

Listen to the Episode
Nov. 21, 2020

Ep 57: TV Court

The fraud lawsuits continue on-- but not for anyone who actually cares about facts. And what are facts, anyway, except a reflection of reality? And isn't reality irrelevant, your honor? I rest my ridiculous case.

Listen to the Episode
Nov. 13, 2020

Ep 56: Last Rat Standing

When you're the only lawyer left (of many) on the case, the question you have to ask yourself is: where is the exit, and how fast can I get there?

Listen to the Episode
Nov. 7, 2020

Ep 55: Drugs Across America

It's a drug free-for-all in this years election. Given the circumstances, is anyone that surprised?

Listen to the Episode
Oct. 31, 2020

Ep 54: Stupid is as Leopard Does

What do leopards, Wayne Newton's monkey, lawnmowers, and the election have in common? Answer: you get what you sign up for.

Listen to the Episode
Oct. 24, 2020

Ep 53: Money for Mushies, Caps for Free

Hippies, rejoice? Measure 109 on the Oregon ballot proposes to make psilocybins, aka mushrooms, legal for manufacture and administration.

Listen to the Episode
Oct. 17, 2020

Ep 52: Annoying Shark

If you think that listening to politics these days is cruel and unusual punishment, just be glad you're not an inmate in the Oklahoma County jail. Or a dad of small children. Same thing.

Listen to the Episode
Oct. 10, 2020

Ep 51: Debate Hate

The debate is off, folks, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy some classic moments in confrontational history. Join us as we celebrate bad behavior from judges, clients, and lawyers in open court.

Listen to the Episode
Oct. 3, 2020

Ep 50: Who's Next

The impossible has happened, and from a legal standpoint, it's only going to get more impossible-er. Join us on Law Bite as we discuss the bizarre mechanics of the 25th amendment, which involves the exchange of various power-grabbing love notes. Yeah,...

Listen to the Episode
Sept. 26, 2020

Ep 49: You Ate the Cookie

The way things are going these days, you can't call the sheriff to arrest the criminals; the sheriff is too busy robbing your house.

Listen to the Episode
Sept. 19, 2020

Ep 48: Oh, Canada

A Canadian man in a Tesla attempts to flee the cops in his Tesla Model S. While sleeping.

Listen to the Episode
Sept. 11, 2020

Ep 47: Snail Mail

What's the easiest way to screw up an election? Just wait until the deadline passes, and then say, "oops."

Listen to the Episode
Sept. 4, 2020

Ep 46: Kanye Gets Confused

Kanye West tries his best to fake his way as an independent. It does not go well.

Listen to the Episode
Sept. 2, 2020

Ep 45: (Bonus Round) The Gun Show

Christian delivers a heartfelt (and scathing) rebuke of those who can't handle their AR15s... sent directly from his home in Seaside, Oregon, where he-- and so many others-- are a little tired of the idiocy.

Listen to the Episode
Aug. 29, 2020

Ep 44: Genius in Hiding

It's a special week where we honor criminals of all kinds, especially those who admit they're guilty but would rather just skip the punishment part, if you don't mind.

Listen to the Episode
Aug. 22, 2020

Ep 43: We Build an SUV

They tried to build the wall, but they ended up building their own bank accounts: Steve Bannon explains from inside his jail cell.

Listen to the Episode
Aug. 14, 2020

Ep 42: Football Fizzle

Football fans across the nation are crying in their soup thanks to the recent cancellation of college football games. Fortunately, Christian has a solution.

Listen to the Episode
Aug. 8, 2020

Ep 41: Elect This

Everyone calm down: there is no legal way to change the election date, unless and until Trump beats Nancy Pelosi in an arm-wrestling match. Pelosi, get to the gym. It's go time.

Listen to the Episode
July 31, 2020

Ep 40: You gotta fight... for your right... to Cockfight

You can hide behind religion for a lot of the stuff that you do, but let's not bring chickens into it.

Listen to the Episode